_Noise_Conspiracy.jpg "The (International) Noise Conspiracy - 002-09-17: 9:30 Club, Washington D.C., USA")
Jim’ll script it
August 8th, 2007 at 22:01
So it’s emerged that the BBC have been faking Bargain Hunt too. I am literally sickened by this lapse in standards – to the point where I don’t even know what is real any more. I’m half expecting to pick up a newspaper tomorrow and read that Doctor Who isn’t filmed in space and Terry Wogan’s hair isn’t the real deal either.
But how far does this conspiracy to deceive honest, hard-working viewers go? I’m starting to think that the so-called “Iraq War” is actually a fabrication and a lie perpetuated by the BBC and its vast left-wing conspiracy to undermine our government, who in my patriotic eyes can do no wrong.
This may sound ludicrous, but have you not seen Tomorrow Never Dies? All you need to do is build a stealth boat and you can say what you like and have it taken as fact.
I’ve actually got some inside information on a brewing scandal – although as the person exposing it, I haven’t got facial hair as excellent as the man who exposed Bargain Hunt. A few years ago I went to see The Late Edition being recorded, and I can exclusively reveal that all wasn’t as it seemed on TV.
The recording actually took longer than thirty minutes – about two hours if I remember correctly. And despite the illusion that it was all done in one go, it was actually filmed in segments, and the floor manager got the audience to clap and cheer at the beginning of each to make the utterly fake segue between bits sounds more realistic.
And the biggest shock of all? It isn’t even live… its recorded the day before.
Daily Mail: I’ve got tomorrow’s front page sorted for you.
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