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    Cameron’s Principles
    February 28th, 2006 at 01:19

    David “Dave” Cameron has apparently come up with some new “aims and values” that will define his evil party- its so radical he’s going to get the party members to vote on them. BBC News online have helpfully summarised what he thinks in a box on their website, and I’m going to assume this is gospel Conservative stuff. So without having actually read the bulk of the article, lets have a look at what these values are:

    Economic stability before tax cuts
    I agree with this.

    Policies must help the least well-off, not the rich
    And this.

    Women’s choices on work and home lives will be supported
    We’re doing well so far- another good idea.

    Public services will not necessarily be run by the state
    Whoops! Yeah, privatisation works. Cough, railways, cough, London Underground, cough, loads of things.

    Party will fight for free and fair trade
    Fair enough.

    Tories will be hard-nosed defenders of freedom and security
    Well I don’t like this! I love oppression! I hate it when people speak their mind. Especially children.

    Government should support home ownership, saving, families and business
    If I was the government I’d have a rapid-reaction squad of civil servants ready to go and piss through letterboxes, rob banks and feed children to dogs. Isn’t this like saying “I’m anti-murder”? Meaningless.

    Government should be closer to the people
    I prefer a government that is completely unaccountable!

    Now I don’t go throwing the term “meaningless bullshit” around too much… but really, why not just tell people you like it when things are nice? Oh, I do this new electable neo-conservative party (hoho!). I wonder what they’ll come up with next? Health care when people are poorly?

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    Categories: Politics |

    Comments(1)

    One Response
    1. James O’Malley… Living Legend » Captain Opportunity Strikes Again
      June 7th, 2006 at 6:21 pm

      [...] It was only back in February when I was moaning about his statement of principles, but he has since topped this with the ultimate “policy”: it’s nice when everyone’s happy, like. Notice how he doesn’t suggest any ways of actually doing this- I believe he said he wouldn’t fiddle with tax or give companies incentives to make their people happy. He’d just hope and said it’d be really really nice if they made things better for employees. [...]

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